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skhammer This caption is for the men. STOP and read. š #chngegiftedme @chnge
Women donāt owe you shit. Yes, you took her out. Yes, you bought her dinner. Yes, sheās wearing a sexy little number. NO, SHE IS NOT REQUIRED TO DO ANYTHING FOR OR WITH YOU!
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Iām particularly thinking of my experience during undergrad. I cannot tell you how many times I overheard guys talking about who they were going to take to formal. (Formals were overnight trips usually somewhere really fancy.) Part of their decision in who to take was who would āput outā. There was an expectation that your date was required to kiss you if you took them to formal. Yes, you spent hundreds of dollars on your date, but no that does not mean they need to kiss you. They donāt need to make/paint you a gift. They donāt need to buy you drinks/snacks for the weekend. Their outfit does not signify that they want to kiss you. They donāt owe you anything. If they agree to go with you, you get their company and their time. Thatās all.
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Iām talking directly to the guys because so much of the messaging women hear is directed to them. IT IS NOT A WOMANāS JOB TO CONTROL MENāS ACTIONS. MEN CONTROL THEMSELVES. Women have been told not to do this or that, not to wear this or that, not to say this or that because it sends a certain message to men. Thatās bullshit. WOMEN CAN DO/WEAR/SAY whatever they want without it meaning anything in particular. Enthusiastic consent is the only thing that means they want to engage in any sort of physical activity with you. Enthusiastic consent is a verbal YES, sober verbal YES, and they can stop at any time. They can change their mind. Also, just because they said yes to one thing doesnāt mean they have consented to anything else.
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Just because they dressed a certain wayā¦
Just because they didnāt say anythingā¦
Just because theyāve done it beforeā¦
Just because they got wastedā¦
Just because they went on a dateā¦
Doesnāt mean yes! Only YES means yes!
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